Slow roasted goodness

Casey likes to tell me that the secret to a good grilled cheese, or other various foods, is slow roasted goodness. Meaning, take your time.

Lately I've been relating this to certain things with my kids. For instance.

The girls and I recently spent some time in Star Valley, WY with Casey's parents. (Casey had to stay home to work.) Two of the days we went to a neighborhood pool, where I observed a young college-age looking girl teaching swimming lessons to various little (4-5 year-old-ish) kids on rotation. It seemed so miserable because she spent most of the time trying to wrangle their attention. They weren't really getting anywhere with the lessons.

Last summer I took Eva to some swimming lessons taught by my good friend Krista. Eva was pretty timid about the pool (and group lesson situations) at that point so the lessons didn't really get her anywhere because she spent most of the time clinging to me. (I don't necessarily regret it because it was super cheap and I'd pay money to spend time with the illustrious Krista.) It wasn't the teacher's fault. Eva just wasn't ready. I realized then that all she really needed was more exposure to the pool. In a non-classroom atmosphere.

Fast forward to this summer where she is having a ball at the pool. She wears a life jacket and every time we go she tries out something new. Jumping in, going under, diving. Even taking off the jacket and just holding onto it to float. She is learning in her own way. Someday formal lessons will probably be a good thing for her. But at age 4 it's not what she needs.

Now Mae. I decided awhile back that I was going to get serious about potty training with Mae. I read about a method where you just take away diapers during the day and deal with the accidents until they realize what they are doing. It's supposed to only take a couple days. Well I didn't even last one morning. It was a mess and just didn't seem right for her. I remembered that with Eva we just started taking her to the bathroom in the morning and after naps when she'd wake up dry. And over time she just got it. So that's what we've been doing with Mae for a few weeks and it's working. She's even starting to tell us when she wants to try.

It's been so stress free for all of us. Joyful, actually. We are so excited for her and she is proud of herself and there is no fighting about it. It kindof eases me into the idea of having to take her potty in public, too. (Diapers are so much easier.)

SO, my point is, at least in these two instances, and at least in our family, slow roasted goodness has been the way to go. Your kid might excel at 4 year old swim lessons. They might do great with the potty-train-your-kid-in-a-day method. But this is what has worked for us so far. And I thought I'd put that out there for anyone who might need another way of seeing things.

It's easy for us as parents to see what other kids and families are doing and feel like we have to rush in and do them to. But I'm learning that I prefer to let them be little and let them ease into things. Instead of fighting and pushing and forcing and getting nowhere. Sure, being "potty trained" in a day sounds worth the effort but it might not be the way your kid works. And for our two girls it isn't. And for this mom it isn't.

So where have I been the last 3 months? Not blogging, no. But growing a baby as most of you already know. We find out on Wednesday what it is! I'll be back to share that news. And then I might just disappear again for awhile. My posts are boring anyway :)